While it's fine and I will readily admit that my folly is to laugh at stupidity, I have to point out that this particular idea is not funny at all. It's entirely too scary. Because somewhere, someone believes this to be an accurate image of reality. If this doesn't terrify you to your core, I'm scared for you!
http://www.wvformarriage.com/
Yeah. Check out the YouTube video attached to the front page of this.
Until the last election, I wasn't aware that wanting to be with my partner in a committed, legally-recognized relationship was a threat. To anyone. Anywhere. I didn't realize that a legal relationship with my partner would do anything to my bosses or their children, who are grown. Didn't realize that their grown sons' relationships, too, would be defined only by how my relationship was recognized.
I also was not aware, despite being both a church-goer and a gay man, that my relationship would put at risk any other couples from being able to have marital counseling from a church. According to the video, this is a fact. We also will keep couples from adopting. Or churches from having services.
And if we don't stop it now, apparently the Earth will implode.
Scared yet? Read on.
What amazes me (and terrifies my very core) is the audacity that some people have to agree with this so clearly misguided view of marriage. If marriage is sacred and worth fighting for, then I leave it to a very humble suggestion--one that in no way originated with me. Attack the real enemies of marriage: divorce, abuse, neglect, and infidelity. Leave a healthy relationship out of the debate--it's not breaking yours.
Want a real kicker in this one? I know more straight people staring down the barrel of divorce (or divorced within the last 2 years) than committed gay or lesbian couples (and I know several).
I'm astounded. Really. If your marriage is degraded by my partner and I being able to be legally recognized as a couple, then my only guess is that your faith life must be as challenged by the whole Da Vinci Code debate. If either case is true, you're a moron. I can't be nice about that. You clearly have lost the capacity of using your brain.
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Pet Peeve of Driving
Maybe I'm a little disgruntled lately. I can accept that. But stupidity is another issue entirely, and I'm not happy about it.
Yesterday I was driving home and had not one, but THREE cars pull out in front of me. There wasn't really space for them to pull into oncoming traffic, but that didn't seem to matter. They had room, so long as I--and everyone following me--slammed on our brakes. Sometimes I wish I could be that narcissistic.
Today during my lunch hour, I had run to get food for the staff. While I was getting near a rather significant intersection, I pulled up, following protocol, toward the car in front of me. Leaving a reasonable space, I looked out my rearview to see a sporty little something inch its way out. I don't mean "inch" like, "Oops, my foot slipped off the brake. Let me fix that." I mean New York City style. The kind where if you have 6 inches between you and another vehicle, that's sacred territory, obviously meant for the person trying to get on the street. It was a 4-lane major street; give it 30 seconds, the light will change, and you'll have plenty of room. You might have to wait a full minute. Get over it.
To make matters worse, right after the idiot pulled out behind me into the second lane--BLINDLY, I might add--the other idiot waiting in the lot for me to pass by seized his opportunity to jump in like a masochist toward a paddle.
And since I'm on this rant...
Why does a truck from a flag company need emergency lights on it? Maybe I'm blind to the situation, but I haven't heard of any recent "flag-related" emergencies. Take the stupid damn lights off your flag truck. You're not an emergency vehicle. And if you are, you need avoid touting your side business on the emergency vehicle. Really.
Yesterday I was driving home and had not one, but THREE cars pull out in front of me. There wasn't really space for them to pull into oncoming traffic, but that didn't seem to matter. They had room, so long as I--and everyone following me--slammed on our brakes. Sometimes I wish I could be that narcissistic.
Today during my lunch hour, I had run to get food for the staff. While I was getting near a rather significant intersection, I pulled up, following protocol, toward the car in front of me. Leaving a reasonable space, I looked out my rearview to see a sporty little something inch its way out. I don't mean "inch" like, "Oops, my foot slipped off the brake. Let me fix that." I mean New York City style. The kind where if you have 6 inches between you and another vehicle, that's sacred territory, obviously meant for the person trying to get on the street. It was a 4-lane major street; give it 30 seconds, the light will change, and you'll have plenty of room. You might have to wait a full minute. Get over it.
To make matters worse, right after the idiot pulled out behind me into the second lane--BLINDLY, I might add--the other idiot waiting in the lot for me to pass by seized his opportunity to jump in like a masochist toward a paddle.
And since I'm on this rant...
Why does a truck from a flag company need emergency lights on it? Maybe I'm blind to the situation, but I haven't heard of any recent "flag-related" emergencies. Take the stupid damn lights off your flag truck. You're not an emergency vehicle. And if you are, you need avoid touting your side business on the emergency vehicle. Really.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Why you shouldn't start dating near V day.
After looking at Les Bian's rant-driven post on Valentine's day, I find myself coming to the same conclusion. Please understand as my disclaimer that while Les was dressed in black and chowing on Chinese last year, I was right on the couch with her. Miserable. Kinda pissed, even.
That said...
This is my first Vday with a boyfriend. With a relationship. Ever. And unfortunately, I am SO ready for the day to be over. It probably didn't help that my partner is working this weekend...and I can't enjoy his company. But that's okay...he's been around for nearly a year, anyway.
Valentine's day means little to me. Perhaps that's because my parents, in their infinite wisdom, choose the "most romantic day of the year" to be married. Yeah, you can commence gagging and dry heaves. God knows I have YEARS of experience on that now. To boot, my one and only sibling was born nearly two years to the day after their wedding.
Know how many Valentine's days in my entire life have EVER been remotely about me? If you guess anything above zero, you're overestimating.
To boot, my partner and I are nearly to our one-year anniversary. He became a little nervous about how to navigate Vday this first year. I'm pretty much a romantic at heart--I read entirely too much, and while Hollywood has influenced my view of romance, literature holds the primary responsibility for my misguided understanding of love. The conversation went something like this:
"So, I have part of your Valentine's present ready."
"Ohhhhh-kayyyyyy. Whatja get me?"
"Right. Like I'm just going to tell you. Do I look dumb or something? Don't answer that."
"Well, whatja get me, anyway?"
"I'm not telling you. But it's fitting."
I can sort of tell when panic sets in, despite his protestations; his voice gets tighter. After a rousing 30-second game of "Why won't you tell me?/Why do you need to know?", I ended the conversation with the mother of all responses.
"Are you asking because you want to know, or so you can know what to get me?"
"No. Maybe. Ummm...."
"Uh-huh. I thought so. Sweetie, darling, love of my life, I don't care what you get me." Bold-faced LIE. "I just want to know you put a little thought into it." TRUTH. (The effective way to lie is to follow it up with absolute truth.)
He mumbled something...or grumbled. I can't really tell.
"Okay, point." I let loose on the parent's anniversary/birthday thing. "The truth is I really just want you to acknolwedge I'm important to you and that there's a romantic attachment here. That's it. Other than that, you're not getting a clue from me."
"So this is a test. Great."
"Not a test, no. Kinda. I just am saying that if it seems a bit cliche, you're probably on track."
"Crap."
For the record, he asked the next day where I'd like to sit--hypothetically, of course--if we were to go to the theatre.
But this brought up a conundrum. Why would someone make such a big deal about a holiday like this? Yes, it has religious roots--I was raised Catholic, I know a tad about St. Valentine. But it's totally commercialized, not unlike Christmas, Halloween, and Easter. I'd much rather celebrate our anniversary, anyway. It's more important to me.
That said...
This is my first Vday with a boyfriend. With a relationship. Ever. And unfortunately, I am SO ready for the day to be over. It probably didn't help that my partner is working this weekend...and I can't enjoy his company. But that's okay...he's been around for nearly a year, anyway.
Valentine's day means little to me. Perhaps that's because my parents, in their infinite wisdom, choose the "most romantic day of the year" to be married. Yeah, you can commence gagging and dry heaves. God knows I have YEARS of experience on that now. To boot, my one and only sibling was born nearly two years to the day after their wedding.
Know how many Valentine's days in my entire life have EVER been remotely about me? If you guess anything above zero, you're overestimating.
To boot, my partner and I are nearly to our one-year anniversary. He became a little nervous about how to navigate Vday this first year. I'm pretty much a romantic at heart--I read entirely too much, and while Hollywood has influenced my view of romance, literature holds the primary responsibility for my misguided understanding of love. The conversation went something like this:
"So, I have part of your Valentine's present ready."
"Ohhhhh-kayyyyyy. Whatja get me?"
"Right. Like I'm just going to tell you. Do I look dumb or something? Don't answer that."
"Well, whatja get me, anyway?"
"I'm not telling you. But it's fitting."
I can sort of tell when panic sets in, despite his protestations; his voice gets tighter. After a rousing 30-second game of "Why won't you tell me?/Why do you need to know?", I ended the conversation with the mother of all responses.
"Are you asking because you want to know, or so you can know what to get me?"
"No. Maybe. Ummm...."
"Uh-huh. I thought so. Sweetie, darling, love of my life, I don't care what you get me." Bold-faced LIE. "I just want to know you put a little thought into it." TRUTH. (The effective way to lie is to follow it up with absolute truth.)
He mumbled something...or grumbled. I can't really tell.
"Okay, point." I let loose on the parent's anniversary/birthday thing. "The truth is I really just want you to acknolwedge I'm important to you and that there's a romantic attachment here. That's it. Other than that, you're not getting a clue from me."
"So this is a test. Great."
"Not a test, no. Kinda. I just am saying that if it seems a bit cliche, you're probably on track."
"Crap."
For the record, he asked the next day where I'd like to sit--hypothetically, of course--if we were to go to the theatre.
But this brought up a conundrum. Why would someone make such a big deal about a holiday like this? Yes, it has religious roots--I was raised Catholic, I know a tad about St. Valentine. But it's totally commercialized, not unlike Christmas, Halloween, and Easter. I'd much rather celebrate our anniversary, anyway. It's more important to me.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Keep your romance out of the commercial pressure cooker
I’m most definitely NOT going out for Valentine’s Day. Look, just a year ago I was still dressing in black and eating Chinese food in protest of the holiday. So consider that your disclaimer for this post.
I find Valentine’s Day, at least the way we’ve come to celebrate it, makes a mockery out of love in because many feel pressured into proving their love to their mate and always falling short of expectations.
How is that romantic?
The folks at Hallmark, the florist and the jewelers got together, through brilliant marketing, and made Valentine’s Day the commercial monster it is. The idea, you see, is to prove your love by spending hundreds if not thousands of bucks on candy, flowers, jewelry and cards.
So, love = money? What?
It’s high time we all stop feeling the pressure to spend tons of money to prove we care.
While I won’t go so far as to criticize those companies for trying to make a buck, that is the American way, I will go far enough to say that spending money in and of itself does not equate love. In fact, there are many ways to show love without spending a dime and often those things are far more priceless than the biggest rock you can purchase.
A backrub, pitching in with the housework, taking your partner to the doctor, listening when he/she has a problem, going for a walk together … all of those things cost no money but show you care. And they’re also things you should be doing on a daily basis, not just this one magical day. Like all living things, love needs nurturing. It needs tending constantly.
While special occasions like Valentine’s Day are a great opportunity to celebrate your love, you shouldn’t feel pressured into spending a crap ton of money. Far too often, I hear tales of paramours going out for an “intimate” dinner on Valentine’s where they had to book months in advance, spend a ridiculous sum of money only to find themselves packed into a corner with goo gobs of other lovers.
Not exactly intimate is it?
Florists have to jack up their prices because of demand, as do jewelry and candy stores. It all quickly devolves into an expensive, high pressure debacle and it doesn’t have to be. You don’t have to do it all.
No where is it written that you have to conform to the notion you have to buy a bunch of expensive stuff and an expensive dinner to be a loving partner.
I realize its February, but it won’t be overly cold this weekend. You and your sweetie could go to the zoo or the park. You could go to the movies and have lunch. Lunch places will still be crowded but not nearly as nutty as they will be at night. You could even go bowling. You could even simply just stay home. That can be quite sexy and loving in its own right. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you take time out to do something you both enjoy together.
I find Valentine’s Day, at least the way we’ve come to celebrate it, makes a mockery out of love in because many feel pressured into proving their love to their mate and always falling short of expectations.
How is that romantic?
The folks at Hallmark, the florist and the jewelers got together, through brilliant marketing, and made Valentine’s Day the commercial monster it is. The idea, you see, is to prove your love by spending hundreds if not thousands of bucks on candy, flowers, jewelry and cards.
So, love = money? What?
It’s high time we all stop feeling the pressure to spend tons of money to prove we care.
While I won’t go so far as to criticize those companies for trying to make a buck, that is the American way, I will go far enough to say that spending money in and of itself does not equate love. In fact, there are many ways to show love without spending a dime and often those things are far more priceless than the biggest rock you can purchase.
A backrub, pitching in with the housework, taking your partner to the doctor, listening when he/she has a problem, going for a walk together … all of those things cost no money but show you care. And they’re also things you should be doing on a daily basis, not just this one magical day. Like all living things, love needs nurturing. It needs tending constantly.
While special occasions like Valentine’s Day are a great opportunity to celebrate your love, you shouldn’t feel pressured into spending a crap ton of money. Far too often, I hear tales of paramours going out for an “intimate” dinner on Valentine’s where they had to book months in advance, spend a ridiculous sum of money only to find themselves packed into a corner with goo gobs of other lovers.
Not exactly intimate is it?
Florists have to jack up their prices because of demand, as do jewelry and candy stores. It all quickly devolves into an expensive, high pressure debacle and it doesn’t have to be. You don’t have to do it all.
No where is it written that you have to conform to the notion you have to buy a bunch of expensive stuff and an expensive dinner to be a loving partner.
I realize its February, but it won’t be overly cold this weekend. You and your sweetie could go to the zoo or the park. You could go to the movies and have lunch. Lunch places will still be crowded but not nearly as nutty as they will be at night. You could even go bowling. You could even simply just stay home. That can be quite sexy and loving in its own right. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you take time out to do something you both enjoy together.
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